So it's come to this: an Adturds newsletter

Advertising might not need me - but you do.

You’ve come crawling back, then?

Yep. A pandemic, fatherhood and the unkillable meerkats nearly finished me off, but I still feel the same impotent rage whenever advertisers see fit to insult, annoy or patronise us. I felt I was still needed - or I still needed this. Not sure yet. For now consider this my metaphorical screaming-into-a-pillow.

Why this, why now

I asked my social media followers whether they wanted more actual writing. A number well into double figures indicated they did. Meet the new blog, same as the old blog – I can state with some conviction that it will be more frequent and with slightly less conviction that it will be funnier.

Remember this guy? EXACTLY.

Am I welcome here?

Have you ever wanted to erase an advert from existence completely? Contemplated throwing something at the television before realising, no, you’re an adult, but still really wanted to? Join me. I can’t do anything about the adverts but I can rip them.

Or are you actually invested in the industry in some way? I’ve never been clear whether many people who work in advertising read AdTurds and I’ve never been sure what to think about it if they do. Sorry, I suppose. But please do join me in case I slate a rival’s work. That’d be nice, huh?

When and how often are doing this, Adturds?

I’m going to post once a week, probably on a Friday. Expect to see the worst advert that has entered into my phaser lock eviscerated, a post from the past that I have rewritten to make it actually funny, a bit of advertising news and perhaps the odd adverts I like. I will actively solicit suggestions too, otherwise I’ll have to watch all the bloody things.

Is this free or what? What’s a pledge? You fucking grifter!

It’s free - all you have to do is sign up using your email and you’ll get the posts straight from my jaded fingers limping into your inbox on a weekly basis like all the other newsletter you don’t read. I might do a paid-for version in the future. If you’d like more AdTurds you can pledge to support me in the future - if and when I start a paid newsletter you’ll be first on the list.

I absolutely, wholeheartedly promise to use the money to create an AdTurds award, travel to London with a film crew, attempt to present it to the directors of an agency, completely fail to do so and make an awkward three-minute video detailing this utter waste of everyone’s time.

Here’s a picture of Ant and Dec doing an advertising in case you’re in any doubt as to vital this whole enterprise is.

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